i hope S**** or M***** or someone took note of the fact that i was drinking popov like water and could no longer form sentences. i mean, dont get me wrong i had been thinking about boning R*** long before my sobriety left the picture but the number of reasons not to, outweighed the temptation and without sir robert burnett as R***'s wingman, it would have never happened
i just told my boss to make it rain at camelot later...what is wrong with me?
His facebook profile says he's interested in men, but i'm choosing to ignore that
it sounds like her vocal chords are covered in pudding and rocks. come get me.
you made me "pop lock and drop it" as a sobriety test last night..
I think jizz is working it's way to becoming my number 1 food source.
Brutal- a couple weeks back I had a 28 hr blackout and four day hangover. S'why I decided to haul it in
I can't believe I paid your booty call for a ride home in cake.
Woke up in my own bed with a "New Years Eve 2011" bar bracelet on. Both of these things confuse me.
Yeah, well I just made $600 while taking a shut cause two diff clients called while I was in here. Tell me being a lawyer doesn't kick ass.
Screw them and thier engaged asses. I've got liquor to drink and boys I don't know to make out with.
dude he's still passed out in my bathtub. and his dick is half way in a 40 bottle... i really hope he was just trying to piss in it
I'm by myself. some Midwest chick is hitting on me because I gave her a deviled egg. I need the distraction.
Well, I got fired yesterday. At least I already paid for my Adele tickets.
That time of your life is like a blur to me. There was churches, car fucking, and conservatives
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