I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
Definitely sounds like it's time for some eggs with a side of strap on
The funny thing is, we kinda did bring guys home cause you had a fort...
I just told the toilet I loved it. Bad sign.
Calling a preemptive no homo on tonight's activities
When she sees your dick for the first time, tell her it glows blue when orcs are close
Nobody knows who they are, but they have an ice luge so they are welcome in my book
You forgot the part where I played Slip and Slide with my own puke and fucked up my knee.
He follows more cats on Instagram then he does girls.. That's how you know your boyfriend is whipped.
I ate the crust off the pizza and left the rest in the box. Even I would hate me.
You continued to run around saying "free the nipple" while "taste testing" every liquor on the premises.
HE WAS SUPPOSED TO BE THE TROPHY HUSBAND! I WAS GOING TO BE THE SUCCESSFUL ONE!
So basically he is jobless, a potential serial killer, and has poor taste in music? We simply don't have time for that.
There I was, puking into the toilet, and he was rubbing my feet, buck naked. I feel like a drunk Disney princess.
Justin has passed out on the toilet in a locked stall. Stay tuned for pics.
Randomize
