My 40 year old neighbors are throwing a party for their eight year old niece's birthday. It's 1am and they're still partying hard. Harder than me. It's Saturday. Just say it, I'm a disgrace to the generation.
I just looked at the maps icon on my IPhone and "eR" was typed in the search address bar. I wonder if we ever got there.
Just got a call at work, I have to consent to a random drug and alcohol test by end of business day, if you arranged this it's the best/worst April fools prank ever.
I think we should make Neil Patrick Harris a permanent part of our role playing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
but you must be fair and judge his penis by normal penis standards and not let your vision be clouded by the rare gem of a penis you have recently encountered
the saddest part is, this is not even the first time i've woken up in a shopping cart with a concussion.
Guess who just rode home in a cop car?! Your Fav flamingo
There is nothing quite so pathetic as sitting in bed in your underwear eating easy mac in complete silence, waiting for Netflix to load
I'm not sure what step "make amends" is, but my phone is on
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Girl re-adjusts bra, no one bats an eye. I re-adjust nuts, everyone stares.
This may be the alcohol talking, but I'm pretty sure I know Spanish now
I just got a rock from a customer. Weirdest. Tip. Ever.
i look like i'm walk-of-shaming but i'm really showered and re-clothed and rallying. i fool everyone
Its official, kitchen-couch is my favorite.
You passed out again didn't you?
its likely that this occurred.
Best part though was when he wanted to cuddle and I was like, I'm going to go.
Randomize