nah, its part of my diet to keep track of the servings of everything i put into my body
how many servings is brandon's dick?
he's making romantic advances towards me. and he has a pet snake. 2nd part not relevant, but interesting.
you started puking right when a nickelback song came on..it was epic
After 10 years all I have gotten is one bra pic, at this point I should be able to draw your cervix from memory
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i should have probably stopped drinking when my beer pong shots were hitting the other team in the face..
yeah thats usually a good indication.
Can we please not be like these pathetic people in their thirties who only get drunk when they go see Sherrill Crow?
I'm just gonna be the bigger person here and say I want you inside me
She looked at me and said there is a 90% chance I am going to puke in the next 10 minutes. 10 minutes later she is in jack in the box throwing up. She has amazing timing.
I feel like he knows I had a dream about him eating me out in the janitors closet at the holiday party. He's giving me THAT look.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
she said we were using the spray butter as air freshener
I left boob prints on the hood of his car. Something to remember me by.
The last thing I remember is crying and shaking my head as she was putting salt on my hand. I guess I took the shot
I'm definitely not at Wal-Mart eating jalapeno poppers with an elevated blood alcohol content
We were drunk waiting for tacos and I gave him a handy in the back of the Uber while giving the driver relationship advice. I think I'm handling the whole grad school thing alright.
Gez, you make a couple noises and all of the sudden your the loud girl.
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