You poured sparks in your panties and NOW you're wondering why you have a UTI?
This guy behind me is answering all of her questions. I may give him a lapdance to take my next test for me
it's like heaven, but drunker
I need someone to get my backpack from the bar before class tomorrow. I have to give my students their papers back.
I think showering with 5 people and a half gallon of vodka was one of the best decisions we have ever made.
All the girls at the party had American flag thongs on... Pretty impressed with coordination seeing as how impromptu this event was
hold on, were in the kitchen painting a yellow brick road to my vagina on my leg with black light paint.
I feel like I have African malaria. I just remembered singing Teenage Dream in full to that biker couple at the bar.
You want anything?
Gatorade and you naked.
I just want to let it be known that I almost put my phone in the fridge.
It takes a special friend to go vibrator shopping with
Yes. It does.
We are gonna sacrifice to and pray to every god in this world that he doesn't find out about her sleeping with his old roommate.
maybe facebook could make a notification like "someone tagged a photo of that guy you used to bang and still think is really hot with his shirt off"
And I’m prepared, because I'm in it to win it (and by win I mean get railed hard)
It's officially "let him eat me out in a sundress with no panties" season. Needless to say the first date was a success.
Randomize
