Do you feel that fire radiating from matt's crotch for you
Gross. gingers suck
is there any particular reason you took a shit in a zip lock bag and left it in my refrigerator?
I'll hook up with guys I don't even like, as long as they leave early enough the next day.
Somewhere during foreplay he said something about me only being with two other guys... I just went with it cause we have never had that conversation...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Basically I learned last night that if you're too polite people will think it's okay to play with your nipples when really its not even a little okay
If Dave says he's going to have sex with her, he's going to fuck her retarded and turn her crazy. So run.
If 26 stitches didn't sober her up, nothing will.
do u know what happened to the bottles last night?
apparently we hid them.... i google mapped the location into my phone
He's getting off drug court. We're doing a super-blunt with 50 dollars worth stuffed inside. He almost cried tears of joy when we told him.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have vodka and explosives. For once, we can blow something up that isn't a blow-up doll.
So how exactly do I backtrack from motorboating and ass grabbing?
I woke up and my pants were in the kitchen but my shoes were next to my bed. Do the math...
Does having sex in an airport bathroom with a girl you just met at the bar count as the mile high club? ...no?
MASS TEXT: Next weekend I will be in town for St. Patty's day. There will be a bonfire and liqour olympics. We will have booze but in order to participate it is byob. Upon arrival everyone will be asked to sign a waiver. I am not responsible for liver failure, death, loss of clothing or memory, bites, scratches, hickies, pregnancies, or any other for of injury you may obtain while participating. There will be ridiculous amounts of green glitter, be prepared to puke it up. ALSO WEAR SOMETHING GREEN OR YOU WILL BE PENALIZED!! AUTOMATIC 5 SHOTS. HAPPY GAMING!!!
21st birthday weekend in Vegas has concluded and all I'm missing is my underwear and 'Contacts' icon on my phone home screen.
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