my night went downhill once I lost my bikershorts. EAWSSSSYY ACCESS
Your dad touched me again.
they thought it would be fun to get out their yearbook and see who hooked up with the most guys..I won...I don't even go to the same school
You just left with that feminine looking guy you kept calling "Jessica." Just giving the heads up.
I would go down on you faster than GM stock
Your dad's facebook is ejaculating midlife crisis all over my minifeed
That poor kid, I literally invited myself over and took advantage of him.
yea I'm sure he was really upset some drunk girl showed up to fuck him.
Do you have to put it that way?
hold on, were in the kitchen painting a yellow brick road to my vagina on my leg with black light paint.
Penises. Penises everywhereeeeeeeee. Penis ratio is sooo disproportionate. I can't NOT get laid tonight.
i just peed with my friends in your backyard... do you still live here
God forbid we drive unregistered mopeds without license plates on a pedestrians only sidewalk without goggles while flipping off passing cars.
You peed in my kitchen, while crying and insisting my floor was a toilet.
So there I was, eye fucking the waiter and I spilled beer all down my boobs
He's so sweet...I can't see him enjoying that I got injured during sex.
Hun your dick isn't big enough for you to be that lame and predictable
Randomize
