Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
I found out 2day that my dad was a stripper in New Oleans.
its easy. just sleep with a bunch of guys until one falls in love
I'm at a Rock of Love themed party. New high? New low? I can't tell.
Wait. Scratch that. It's not themed. These girls are just sluts.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Woke up with a chicken parm sandwich in my clutch. Aaaand I'm eating it.
Also managed to rip my pants and set myself on fire. And oddly enough I'm still not ready to ask for 2010 back.
i had to wake up at 4 am to do my laundry because I was afraid if I saw people in the laundry room they would judge me by the amount of clothes I had covered in vomit from syllabus week
He is now tagging himself in my pics from last year where he is barely visable in the corner. i feel like he's marking his territory.
It was like the Alcoholic Olympics...double fisting fifths with eight 40s in my backpack...running from the cops in stilettos. I will have bitchin' hamstrings come Monday.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Benefits of having to stay in jail for the weekend: learned how to make my own make up out of colored pencils. Also how to make use of toothpaste for hair products. Downfall was probably getting hit on by a murderer. Only me.
what the hell makes you think you get to decide what your going to wear at our weding!?
Now that it's over, I can finally say it and not feel bad,dude. Her mustache is better than yours.
The cat just brought me a bottle opener. I think she's my soulmate.
I'd ask how but then you'd tell me.
The seven of us sank the first paddle boat, but the second one was much nicer and we stayed afloat. Best night in a while, but we had to walk of shame for a mile.
Why are you rhyming?
Too stoned. That is how my thoughts are collecting.
I get sad thinking about all the sex I’m missing out on because of the virus
I instituted “quarantine and chill” months ago. It’s not like penises go soft just because they’re working at home.
Randomize