He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
I wish i knew how bad drinking and hieghts were before i got up here
I had the most spectatular hardon this morning. I think it was trying to reach you in Wisconsin.
i'm all for saving the environment, but when we get into the shower to fuck, he shouldn't flip his shower hourglass timer
This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
smoking weed is really the only logical conclusion to hangovers
he said I could live with him because I'm cheaper than a dog and don't need a pet deposit. That and I don't piss on the carpet...
Han Solo would be ashamed of me.
So I almost just died there. And we need a new garage door.
Home-made laxative recipe: activia yogurt and tequila shots. Any ratio ought to work.
30% sure Kevin and I just adopted a cat. Talk to me when the sun's up but I really feel like that's a thing.
I ripped off the screen and literally supermaned through my bedroom window. That wasted
"Accidentally" bump into him after class.
I'm gonna "accidentally" put his dick in my mouth.
We used to bone, but now she's my life coach.
Lol for real, I'm Kylie Jenner "this is my year of realizing things" right now
Randomize
