I woke up this morning with I hate myself feeling
Wow, you were right... Weed does start conversations
sometimes in life you just needs hand puppets
is it possible for your nipples to fall off? if so mine might. they hurt so bad...
I'd give my left nut to see you
don't do that. I like the set
i felt horrible..i wanted to somehow give him his vcard back
that's a non refundable transaction sweetheart
Don't judge me. If you're going to fall off a bed you might as well do it gracefully into a bag full of beer.
It was one of those "I have no idea if this will ever happen again so I can't say no" opprotunities. Part of me was like, "You slut" and the bigger part was screaming, "Hell yeah"
It's "your husband had his mouth on my vagina" awkward.
At some point I'd like to figure out how the weird kid from sociology ended up on my couch naked hugging what appears to be some sort of clothing....seriously it's creeping me out
Well the strippers have danced to goo goo dolls and green day, time of your life. Were all gonna commit suicide.
He put his name in my phone as David Hot Guy With Tattoos and I fell in love because that's what I was going to change his name to anyways
idk the fact that her roommate had a sign that said "enter without knock, exit without cock" makes me really NOT want to go steal her pot.
Woke up naked on your sister's mattress lying next to a single slice of bread.
I mean, I'm not upset that HE's getting married, I'm upset his penis has to go through with it by default
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