We found an eightball on the ground last night. I mean, really, who does that?
Fuck?...well quicky, i have to study...unless you can read my book while i bang you, then it can last four chapters
I can be that talented
just saw a girl throwing up in a taco bell nacho cantainor going 60 down the highway
did u get his digits?
yes his name is chazbangbangbang according to my phone...
And here i was gonna offer you a complimentary blowjob.
It was a two-sided wall so part of my body ended up in someone elses condo.
Nope she woke up in a hotel room alone on 55th street. A guy in a lamborgini gave her a ride this morning. She was walking barefoot home
Fuck morning classes and our weekday drinking habits.
WHYAREWHITEGUYSSOBADINBED?! What the fuck went wrong, evolution?
I'm stoned and just shared 4 cookies with this chicks dog
They're raisins though so they're healthy. No worries.
Except if I'm having sex. In which case you're in the bed with us or out of the room. No halfsie participation.
The only way he could ever pleasure me is if he lit himself on fire and let me watch
... why is there baby oil , black socks and frozen hot dogs in the sink this morning ?
so we have roughly decided that hes the dude all the chicks will bang in college, just so he will do their term papers
I promise it wsnt a penis when i put it in my mouth
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