I think condoms have that nasty latex smell to remind you in the morning of how gross you are.
well you decided to make everyone "drinks" which was sprite and beer mixed.
I passed out on the floor of a truck stop. Drinking binge 2011 is now over.
Got a thumbs up from a trucker for doing lines on the interstate. God bless america.
For future reference "I'm too drunk to come today" is an acceptable line to get out of work. I love my job
Ya I painted "STOP TRYING ANAL" on her headboard. I'm sick of listening to her whine through the wall and bitch the next day.
I let him do a line off my nipple in exchange for his prescription pain pills. I feel like 3/4 Vegas stripper, 1/4 underbelly of society.
We were so drunk that when I broke the bottom off a pint glass we decided to make it into a candle holder. How does that happen?!
I literally just fucked insane clown pussy. 24 yo nut job moonlights at children's parties. Gave me head while still in full clown makeup from my kid's birthday party.
That's not a current picture, because if you look deep enough into my eyes you can still see morals. Not these days.
should i save it for someone special or be a feminist and be like "my vagina doesnt define me"
I didn't think it was possible but he dislocated his thumb during intercourse last night then cried
In tonight's episode of Travis' Fucked up Sex Life, Travis breaks into a building at Tulane to have sex with an attractive Asian man.
U know this is gone far when im in the bathroom trying to take a pic of my asshole
The dog peed on the neighbors baby Jesus. No wonder she thinks we're the devil.
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