Why were you high on a thursday?
today's a wednesday
I asked first.
We had to be out of the dorms at 730. Meeting started at 8. I woke up at 948. Drunk and covered in glitter.
He's paying me $45 to clean his room and $55 if i find the oxy that he lost.
He held me the entire night. Not endearing kind of way. Like kidnapping or held hostage kind of way.
im trying to find a facebook picture of him that doesnt make me regret sleeping with him. its not working
i feel like i am carryihg a baby. a baby made of alcohol.
Why have her stay eight hours when I only last eight minutes?
If life deals in absolutes, the in betweens are the most hairy.... Fortune cookie wisdom from a stoned Megan.
we got kicked out of her coke dealer's house when we wouldn't stop quoting "a league of their own"
communist
Hi, my name is Ashslay and I'll be your designated shitshow.
He was on top and as he finished he yelled "I love gold" , so yeah I'm seeing him later tonight
So besides your brother walking in on you shaving and singing "I'm gonna get asssss" how was your night
Whoever was doing lines off my iPad is a dick. Also bring Gatorade, for I hunger
For Who flesh?
Ate his Chinese food and drank his beer and played with his chihuahua. All while wrapped in a towel while he was sleep.
Can we just take a minute to acknowledge that you're drinking with your gay ex boyfriend's DAD who is a DEACON??
Randomize
