Until that no good dick sucking whore stays away from my boyfriend I am gonna start blowing all of his friends...
she left out the fact that she had a kid until she told me not to suck on her tits too hard or milk would come out.
just so you know... i was wasted last night, but the evening is coming back to me in flashes... i made you eat gravy last night, didn't i?
I know you're trying to keep the moaning to a minimum but the banging on the wall is totally giving you away
I don't appreciate the fact that you tagged me as a giant bucket Miracle Whip.
nah, they dropped the charges. apparently ripping his junk when he tried to hop the fence seemed like punishment enough...
Sorry I forced you to take an adderall at 1am and then proceeded to dance to Lose Yourself outside of Qdoba.
Of course not. I'd be offended if you didn't bring my boobs into casual conversation.
Whenever I'm not in the mood and don't want to go to bed swampy, I just strategically suck him off during the second period intermission of the Cup playoffs and he leaves me alone and does the dishes. It's a win-win.
Just got a 200 dollar safe, two jars, and a 500 pack of rubber bands.. This doesn't SCREAM drug dealer does it?
...you should fill the cart some more
Is it weird that the best sex I've ever had was to Barbara Streisand's Christmas album?
How hot? Like... how many hemsworths?
if it makes u feel better, i skipped class so i could go to a sex convention in jersey a few hours earlier than if i went to class.
it’s my vagina i can do what i want to
And to be clear I have only watched porn like 3 times at work
Randomize
