Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
I'm watching a Sinbad stand up special. Not even drugs can make this funny.
Like if god were to send me a cock shot, that's what it would look like.
Alright I don't know how you'll link it to me but yes I left a nearly empty 12 pack on your trunk
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Let's just say, at one point i got woken up at 4am by a naked guy who was offering me steak, in a cup.
Bad behavior is like a petri dish that grows organically In my heart
By "met a doctor" I really mean "fucked a pre med student"
I swear god is testing me by giving me awesome guys with tiny penises
Just come get me. Somewhere there's hobo that's going to want his dumpster back, and I kinda want to be gone when he discovers the vomit.
These 17 Delivery Dudes Suck At Their Jobs But Are Winning At Life
I told her I named my penis "The Spirit of Exploration." That's all it took.
Oh and someone pissed in my shoes, so I'll let you figure that out.
He snapchated me a photo of his penis with the caption "it needs a home".
Pretty sure my first birthday present will be a pic of an 18-year-old's cock. And I am OK with that
I tried to help you up but you said "let me dance it off"
You casually put your finger in my ass and other people are weird..