Well if yoir are still awake and secided to drink... You may aswell drink
That text needs to switch to water.
life lesson #1: a fart during an awkward silence between 2 strangers doesnt make it less awkward.
so chris just stuck his hand between rachel's legs and yelled 'TROUT!' and we were like...you're wasted
I am currently eating pure cake frosting...I am not sure how I was ever referred to as a responsible adult.
im pretty sure all they do is fuck. and talk in baby talk. its two babys fucking basically.
Just spent a extra 20 minutes on the phone with the lady from unemployment talking about how to make the best brownies.
you know by doing this we are using dad as a drug mule right?
Found out why they call her Halfpipe Jenny-NOT the cool reason we thought
My dick is covered in produce stickers. I suspect you
i'm about to rub a glazed donut on my face just so it feels like you're here
She told me she loves her boyfreind while she was giving me head. He must be a nice guy
Ok roommate is officially weird. Just watched her microwave the same broccoli 3 times in a row and cry b/c she fucked it up. Wtf lol
I walked in and all four of you were covering your heads under the blanket singing waterslides in unison.
U thinks that's bad? He told me that he had to envision high school wrestling in order to bust a nut with some girl
In honor of Sarah Palin's bday I suggest we watch Nailing Palin