i'm touring the leper colony via mapquest street view so we dont have to go there
you need to do more things constructive for your career. like wearing pants more often.
everyone knows that carl winslow was the sexiest man in die hard.
i tried to hook up with a mom and then her husband came with num chucks
I wonder what gingers are like in bed...as awkward as their hair or just as unique as it...?
There's limited edition cherry vanilla nyquil. It's like they know how much I hate myself and they're giving me a consolation prize.
It's an open bar on a yacht... I'm going to drown.
I got groped on the dancefloor by both grooms. I love gay weddings
He just walked up to be, grabbed my boob and said 'i think they have shrunk' i have no idea who he was.
Just crossed the line from casual pregrame to public intoxication. Shotgunning in a bus shelter.
When he grabbed my tits it felt like he was either giving me a mammogram or trying to pierce my nipples with his fingers.
Then pass out next to me, I'll be under a pong table or a park bench. Really depends on the weather during Mifflin
i went to the 24h massage place last night and brought down the price for a hand job from $50 to $12.75 and half the big mac left in my bag.
He kept kissing me on the cheek when I was pretending to sleep while he cried
Who's the captain of your team? Captain Morgan as usual?
And me
Randomize
