I feel like tequila is Gods way of lighting my fuse to do something awesome
On blowjobs: "If you decide to go there, you finish the job. No complaining." I don't care if it sounds like she's talking about Iraq, I'm in love.
thats the last time i clean cum out of my retainer.
We went to his house and he brought a jar of pickles to bed. I think im in love.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just got my cast off. My occupational therapist wants me to self-gratify. My clit is about to have an awesome weekend...
I dare you try and top an Eiffel tower full of Margarita
Made dad pull of the highway twice on the way home so I could puke. Yeah i'd say we ended the semester well.
Just saw a huge group of people walk by in there in their underwear. Too stoned for this.
Hey, i turned the toilet into a water fountain. Drink up.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'VE CAME 4 TIMES TODAY. I AM AS DRY AS THE SAHARA, STOP YOUR WHINING.
It would have been nice to break the dry spell with nice, civilized, sober sex somewhere other than on my friend's couch.
Beer and Reeses. dinner of champions
in the middle of telling this chick to sober up i was shotgunning beers. im gonna be ab awsome nurse.
"suitors" is just a nice way of her saying "the guys i'm fucking"
So... he's my second cousin's step-bro... To do or not to do?
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