HOW IN THE HELL DID YOU BLOW A .24?????
We were watching I'm a celebrity get me out of here and taking shots every time heidi said HALLELUJAH, and started spraying her hair with that stupid dry shampoo shit....and we only watched the last half hour.
anal on a first date. tsk tsk.
Steve is enlightening me on how and why u put gerbils up your ass
Needless to say, wine tasting turned into wine chugging
What wine goes with Cap'n Crunch?
the facebook you made of my ass has 10 times more friends than i do.
took 4 advil with a shot of vodka, figure i'd try to save myself now
Bruises. Everywhere. Table sex is dangerous
I'm so disappointed in myself I can actually taste it.
Does it taste like semen?
My gay card got upgraded to platinum status today.
So it's my mom's birthday and I wanted to be super cheap and just walk up to her and say "I got you the greatest gift ever, mom! I'm actually sober right now!".
He made me ask permission to to cum and it made me cum.
I just punched myself in the vagina to prove a point. Please pray for me.
You just sent a mass text asking if anyone ever drank the blood of a goat in the glorious name of Satan...after that we confiscated any writing utensil
A drunk frat boy just jumped on the hood of my car while I was driving down Bridge St. He yelled at me to keep going since he was playing frogger and needed another car to jump on... or a log. I hate this town.
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