Help i just walked in on mom blowing dad
I keep getting texted pictures of my husband with other men. I can't figure out if he wants a divorce or a threesome?
Can you deep fry cheerios do you know? crucial question
I am planning my day around naps and lesbians.
I automatically know you're drunk now as soon as you start yelling in spanish
You ordered 6 boxes of pizza and laughed in the pizza guys face when you didn't pay for any of them.
She just passive-aggressively stripped in the kitchen while humming the theme to Doug.
Idk. Im in a bed. the walls are wood. There's a deer mount.. im afraid to turn over and see who's next to me but he's violently cuddly.
We're shaving superhero symbols into our pubes. I call dibs on Batman.
he wouldnt let me in bed until i took off all the stickers i was covered in
How high is the bridge and how deep is the water and what are the chances I will get arrested
Well if I can't snuggle you, I might as well snuggle a stranger's cat.
fucking him is like fucking old faithful. you could set your watch by his orgasms.
I just deff did the walk of shame.. His roommate/manager woke us up. A dog scared me on my stumble to the car.
This is why I'm single.
Breakfast sounds amazing but can we do IHOP instead? I have to pick up a Plan B pill and there’s a CVS next to it
Randomize
