The last thing I remeber was convincing you to hide in the fridge, and then taking everything out and you not fitting.
he was lying next to me and i saw him text "score" to someone.
You kept telling that ginger girl, "it's not your fault, it's not your fault, it's not your fault."
Swear. I think after passing out in a community college parking lot I can safely nominate myself for the piece of shit of the year award
shes on the floor puking and texting simultaneously.
This girl would not stay down. It was like night of the living dead. She kept on rising up to haunt anything with a penis
A beer fell out of the case, hit the ground and started spraying. He's a pro. He grabbed it and shotgunned it while still holding the case.
WHITE RUSSIAN WEDNESDAY. TELL YOUR CO WORKERS. INVITE QND PREPARE
Golf group in front of us has 2 hooker caddies. One guy was getting a lap dance as he waited to tee off. Only in vegas.
At some point i could of swore that you were in my bedroom riding a manatee last night..... I like my new dealer
Chill out, I'm getting ready as fast as I can. I didn't even masturbate in the shower.
I snapchatted his face mid sex. Needless to say, I don't think I'll ever see him again.
He thought I was gay. I had to explain I just really like wearing flannel.
Would it defeat the purpose of a run if I ran to McDonalds?
New one isn't as good asmy ex. She won't put her tongue up my butt
Peter this is your "ex"
I stand by what i said
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