my mario cart skills improve with alchohol. and i think my real car skills do to but the cop didnt see my logic
I am going to be in the room whjen you have your first child and spit on its face before its even all the way out of you.
Can you get arrested or in trouble for punching a dead relative in a casket?
do guys with small dicks even attempt to pursue romantic relationships?
I didnt shave my beard last night, so I could feel it while Im shrooming today
do you think theyll let us bring mariachis to the strip club?
We eventually get in a cab (after david tried to hail multiple regular cars and some sort of shuttle bus)
I'm alone drinking at the bar and the titanic theme song is on. This won't end well.
I woke up to him yelling "WHO SLEEPS WITH A BEER IN THEIR HAND?!?" this of course, startled me awake and made me spill the aforementioned beer. So I guess the a answer is- not this girl, not anymore. Asshole
So, settle a debate for my housemates. Have you measured your dick. And how long. Results Will not be disclosed
Well sure, my hetero side is thrilled, but my gay side is soooo judging
I like that you use a Disney movie to describe the starting of our BDSM relationship, lmao
I saw seagulls fucking earlier today. What have you done with your life recently?
You know you have a problem when your man yells at you that his penis is not your personal play toy.
I don't know if I'm more disturbed by the fact that you hooked up with a dude with one arm, or that "hook up with a dude with one arm" was on your bucket list.
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