does wine, beer, and vodka mix well??
dude, everything can mix, this is college.
Shaving your vagina at 8 months pregnant is not an easy chore.
Did your dad mention the fact that you asked him for viagra at 2 in the morning?
Are you still at the party or did I leave?
Acid flashbacks - fact or fiction? Have been seeing a surprising amount of sparkly shit this afternoon...
She made me role-play everything from an older prof to a in-patient in need of a medical exam. Yay for cocaine.
Seriously. He was just sitting there naked in the dark with a boner pissed that I came home late.
Ok seriously I'm living off of bologna but I have 4 handles in the freezer.
I cant believe you went home with her.. Your poor immune system and the shit you put it through.
Seriously this night has "go home now before you cry, puke or scream on someone" written all over it.
DONT EVER DUNK OREOS INTO WINE . NEVER
So hungover. Walked into room and poached their catering before realized in wrong place. Scowled and ate it anyway
sorry i got drunk at sunday brunch and force fed carrot sticks to your cat
My dog just blew me a kiss. First of all I'm stoned and second of all he's a pitbull. Those aren't sexual dogs. So wtf.
My vagina knows your penis is sad about Andrew Luck. You should come over and let her comfort him in his time of need
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