I thought she had more class and brains than to date a complete numb-nut, drug addict, fuck up like him. People never cease to amaze me
LETS GO REDSKINS!
Quit drinking and watching your DVR, it's wednesday.
we played lady & the tramp with a hash brown from McDonald's....im in love.
All he said was "Yeah, there's a lot of air down there. And penis."
Puked in my laptop case in the middle of my nutrition class.
The guy who took my order at mcdonalds asked for my number. I think we should start fucking fast food employees, they're easy and think we're goddesses.
Now he's trying to use the tornado warnings as an excuse to get head. Yeah, b/c THAT'S the last taste I want in my mouth b4 I die...
using blue streamers we found on the bathroom floor was probably not the best substitute for toilet paper.
Somewhere between yelling how am I gonna make it to my flight and more titie shots I stopped caring
ARE YOU SAYING THAT YOU DON'T WANT TO GO TO A PARTY AT AN ADULT STORE WHERE A BUNCH OF HOT GIRLS ARE DRINKING
I'm beer bonging chocolate fondue. That's how my Valentines Day is going.
I've finally given up enough on finals week to wear the same shirt three days in a row, because I didn't take my hoodie off for the first two.
I fear our relationship is coming to an end. Last night I felt the need to bloody apologise for waking him up with a blow job.
I'm sorry I keep drunk texting your boyfriend sports updates.
That's okay. He needs friends too.
I swear I'm going to walk in one day with you in a ballgag just masturbating feverishly
Well i can't stand the sound of my own crying
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