Do you think they could tell I was high on that conf call?
just had a super intense, drunken debate about which blink182 member is the most fuckable. i got so mad i left the room. new low.
just spent all of my last class as a college student, vomiting in the bathroom. its moments like these i will cherish
DO NOT FUCK HIM ON MY BEAN BAG CHAIR
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We had sex in the ocean but the tide took our clothes away too. Its no fun walking back to the dorm wearing only a beach blanket between you.
I'm cooking a can of baked beans on the baseboard heater. It is too early in the semester to be this poor.
my mom just left...time to break out that water bottle of wine that I sewed into my teddy bear
Come get me we have a petting zoo to throw up in.
HES DOING PULLUPS BE STILL MY BEATING HEART
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Stripper just cleaned my glasses with her nipple...
Welcome to Missouri, the show me your genitals state.
I woke up in the basement of a pizza restaurant... I would say the tequila hit me pretty hard.
I'm the girl holding the bag of goldfish
I need you to sex the hangover out of me again.
He made me cum 3 times, then immediately after sex packed a bowl and passed it to me. Yeah.. I'll keep him.
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