your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
i either just vomited on a lesbian or a small boy
is it cool if i come over and use your computer?
what happened to yours?
i got a little to drunk last night and threw up on it...then i tried to wash it off under the sink.
You screamed 'pound me, you big thick stud.' I looked around for porn cameras.
Shut up. I did not.
I really wish I was making that up.
finally nailed that neighbor chick. hopefully i can get her wireless password now. free internet trumps moral standards any day
some girl in front of me in class just googled "hungover+throwing up blood"
I shaved my legs finally. I am starting to remember what my skin feels like.
time for a it's-monday-night-and-this-week-is-gunna-suck-drink.
Wanna go watch Transformers and scream "AMERICA!"? I need a no thought activity
So getting drunk in honor of the bomb threat is legit right?
I'm venturing to your corner of this sin house in t minus 2 minutes.
Just got assigned a beer bong as hw in fluids to demonstrate the inverse of pascals principle. I love this prof
ten seconds after he was done making out with the blonde, he rips off his jacket and screamed "Goddamn it, you know I like brunettes"
I have never seen someone so pissed at getting some. i called dibs so fuck him
I think we ended 5-7 relationships as well this weekend...so another good stat
im about to go through the checkout with 3 flasks and a wedding card. let the judgement begin!
update: cashier guessed cash bar before i could say anything. completely bypassed "dry" and knew cash bar right away. i love this state.
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