I was being carried out of the bar, but then my friend saw Pat who just got kicked out scaling the wall to sneak back in, so he carried me back in, sat me on the bar stool, and the bartender just let us all keep drinking.
Being persistent has its perks my friend.
By the way, I think my next facebook status update will read, "Aaron recently found out Vanessa's a screamer."
oh god.
Just got walked in on during safety inspections
Think you passed?
I have a question, if it paid really well, like ridiculously well, would you be a restaraunts under the table resident blowjob girl?
obviously you don't know the college version of myself. if there's something i'm ALWAYS willing to put up for it's alcohol.
If i apologize for punching you in the liver repeatedly will you explain where the grass stains on my shoulders came from?
You mean the girl who was passed out face down on the bathroom floor until 10 AM? You're right, she was cute.
But he's not just anonymous male genitalia anymore. I've met him, I've seen his face.
By the way anyone who is willing to be in the film while tripping gets free shrooms.
Just got arrested in my crocs and rolled up pants with a mr rogers sweater for literally fucking nothing can u come get me?
How drunk is she?
She's trying to French braid the dogs hair, there's no stopping her
You know you're gay when you have to have your coworkers explain to you why your bracket is terrible
We went camping and met these lesbians and now I have S'mores where there shouldn't be S'mores.
Your pictures have evolved a lot over the years but I think your angry dick pic phase was one of my favorites
Um so I might have accidentally on accident maybe blew up the bottom half of your truck...
Randomize
