Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
Why do bread and butter chips remind me of eating out your mom?
Just woke up next to our cab driver from last night. Please tell me this isn't happening.
So im guessing you dont remember the walk home, where you layed down in the alley and began to sing "threes company too" and when i told you to get up you had the nerve to tell me i was to drunk.
My dream had 1 penis and 2 pizzas in it. Priorities?
You texted me 'I am the leopard prince', with a series of pictures of you posing in what seemed like cat poses. you were not "a little bit" drunk dude..
I thought my ass was sore from the gym then I realized it was from being spanked. Confusing time in my life.
Either I think of sex like a man, or all the men in Vegas are women.
the fact that you have a guy named the "i want you to tie me up and fuck me" guy speaks volumes about your life.
You know we have no secrets, right? I mean, you saw me shitting in a gift bag drunk and naked on Christmas eve.
I appreciate your acceptance of my lack of morals
We drove through Taco-Bell on our way to the ER
Hopefully they won't bring up last year's Christmas party. I kind of predicted my great aunt's death...
I just realized it's officially fall..I had sex while watching Halloween
Randomize
