Kiss
Puke
So I thought I was doing pretty good and then I sneezed and prematurely ejaculated...
I can only be a whore so many days outta the week.
Samesies
I need to not be around brick walls while intoxicated.
Like fighting the continuous urge to sing Neil diamond "coming to America" kinda fucked up right now
I was just informed that I have the perfect belly button for body shots... Best compliment ever.
She was purple for Halloween. She literally spray-painted herself purple and called it a costume. It won't come off.
Is that a polar bear? You seriously grinded with a polar bear at the club?
You're just gonna have to make the sacrifice man.
I'm trying to hide in the table.
It was a simpler time. With fewer STDs.
Not bad. Ran into Carlo. He shared a story about a sailor who got gonorrhea in his eye. It made me feel better about myself.
i'm not so sure everythign we did last night was legal...
What is ur current declared sexuality for my bingo board
how do do this?
do what? Keep standing? Choose between 2 guys?
keep making boys cry?
I like that they’re all named Christopher or Chris. No need to worry about moaning during!
Randomize