There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
I went to the gynecologist and they said, "you're the most fun person we've ever had," and i thought, "that's exactly why i'm here!"
Ian has mac and cheese all in his bed/on the wall. Either you did it or he fell asleep with a bowl in his hand and spasmed in his sleep.
Cooked or uncooked?
I would give away a ton of these clothes but I doubt there are any homeless people who dress as slutty as me
her underwear stopped being sexy when i saw her pubes sticking out of the top.
def just vomited mimosa in the gym trashcan. i weigh less already so i say its been a solid workout.
I could see myself reflected in his wedding band as i was going down on him.
He titled his birthday party on facebook, "BJ's in PJ's- an adult slumber party." I'm the only one invited.
My sister hid me from my parents, brought me a bloody mary, and told my girlfriend I was out with my dad. For 13, I got to say she's working out pretty good.
All I want is for every tall lanky young guy who is reading in a Starbucks to go balls deep in me. That's all.
People don't tend to fuck with you when they think you have someone else's blood on your face
Last night dinner was cinnamon buns and whiskey. At least tonight I had a fajita with my cookies and tequila. I may be a little stressed about these end of semester tests.
If one of us has to be polite I guess I won't sneak out while he's in the shower
Thanks for bringing me tea/a bucket. You have earned yourself a face touch.
HAVE BEEN SPEAKING IN RUSSIAN ACCENT FOR 5 HOURS