is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
Starbucks introducing alcohol. i hear angels singing.
Should I tell Kevin that my finger was in his sister's ass last night?
i just walked downstairs to find my brother wearing a crossingguards vest and boxers. when i asked him where he got it he just looked at me, smiled, and kept feeding the dog yogurt
People Are Arguing Over This Guy’s Petty Reaction To Splitting Lunch With His Co-Worker
I was going to call you an awful person for that. but then i realized we're both awful people.
Really* awful people.
It's because you were crossfaded. And because drinks were 3 dollars. And because they accepted credit cards.
I'm promising sexual favors in return for his responsible life decisions. Now THIS is growing up.
I really need to stop drunk texting. My one night stand just agreed to go roller skating.
You should make cookies and when I get home we can have a slow motion hug and eat them
Girl Logs Into Twitter Only To Find Out Her Dad Is Trending For The Most Outrageous Reason
You said you didn't want to drink anymore so you started shooting vodka down the back of your throat using a syringe. Oh, and then you aimed it at my eye ball...vodka in the eye hurts btw.
When you guys came back from the bar, I thought everyone was a T-Rex - Thats why i was hiding under the table. Never doing shrooms with Drunk people again
So a guy died and our dates revived him with CPR. Good night?
yea plus he's gonna be wearing his gumby costume so that'll take a lot of pressure off too
So I crawled off the trampoline to puke in the neighbors yard. Wonderful house guest right here
He doesn't have much of a personality but he makes up for it with his sexual prowess