he came and i only had my diet coke to rinse.. can you say coke float?
were doing shots for every snowflake that hits the ground
I fucked my boyfriend 15 minutes before my pap test. My gyno probably thinks I hate her.
I decided that $2 and a kiss on the cheek was a great tip for the pizza girl. No one is REALLY sure how much I've have to drink.
Nothing says I have a hang over like telling your boss to "eat your shit"
He was on Keeping Up with the Kardashians it was like a deed from god to bang him
You are the only person I know that goes to a bar enough to charge your iPhone there....
there's nothing like the elf drinking game to get me in the christmas spirit.
It's ok. Rob's just shotgunning upside down.
Is your answer to that text seriously a right parenthesis
Someday. I cant very well invite myself to his dorm room. And I'm 28. The excuses to be drunk and running into him at uconn are rather slim. Although I'm working on it.
Piecing together the sordid story from witness accounts and photographic evidence, courtesy of Fcebook. My night included Mojitos, lighting the bar on fire and declaring myself the Queen of Nerds when I stole someone's flashing tiara. Woke up this morning with a velvet cape and plastic scepter to match. Mojitos are awesome!
my dad has now seen 6 different dudes grab my ass. i guess i should start a list.
they call themselves the foursome.. thats def means they're up for one right?
Can I come kidnap you from work so we can chug mimosas? My little brother has a ski mask I can borrow.
Randomize
