Smith looks like a guy that goes on a lot of first dates
dude, that girl smelled worse than the great depression.
found a dugout with weed in it in dad's car. decided to top up the weed compartment with salvia. for fun.
I either date the nice guys or the assholes. There isn't any in between.
You need to find a taint.
Billy Mays is dead, Vince Schlomi is in jail, who's going to sell me useful gadgets at ridiculously low prices now?!
At Wal-Mart last night I watched two guys scramble for $4.34 to pay for a pack of ping pong balls and red solo cups. They had to put the .34 on a credit card. Winter break begins!
I would totes be making out with random people in the name of america if I was at the white house right now
I'm treating myself to a " uve slept with yet another mr. Wrong" breakfast
If you end up at a gay bar on a tuesday night in steelers pjs, does that mean youve hit rock bottom?
He's gotta be able to drive a truck, make me mac n cheese and give me the best orgasms. That's my perfect man
Pretty sure that molly fried my sinus infection away; i regret nothing
just saw a sign in the bar that says "no more naked fridays". Where the fuck was I on these naked fridays?
I just got three pairs of underwear free and a bathing suit for $20 by modeling them and letting the salesman grope me a bit.
It's great being a young gay man in Chicago!
Yeah! Just remind me to. I'll also bring the blow up penis
Crying while I'm pooping. I think this is rock bottom
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