My dick has been asking about u. He said he didn't do anything wrong n I'm a dumbass
It's nice to sit in the library and see the progression from freshman pledge to 6th year coke addict all at one table. Gotta love sororities
thankjk goddddn taco bell uis open htis lateee!
you do know it's eleven in the afternoon, right?
Ok that kid was ether gay or 12 with a beard.
Oh, and that ugly chick transformed into a veritable goddess when she came back at 3AM with a handle of vodka and 100 chicken wings
Some guy just stopped me in the bar and asked if I had a shot named after me at another bar called God damn my VaJana hurts? He already knew my name was Jana so I couldn't deny it!
I have been drinking since 2. And I'm now chasing the cat around the house with a light saber. Anna's helping.
Last night was the first and hopefully last night I will ever sleep in a hotel bath tub. Sober mind you.
I'm not even gonna ask.
I think I want to impress his gay best friend more than him..
I need to hump something and I know u understand.
And we're now at 8 people from the office coming to my desk to ask me "do you feel better?".
my favorite sex position is the one where no sex actually happens we just get really stoned and eat a lot and watch netflix in the dark
Im gnna go loik fir my newq gay friuend now
Goodbee
Once you find out someone has a small dick, you never look at them the same again.
Maybe for you. You don't have to clean the melted butter off the stove. I LOST THE SPECIAL SEASONINGS.
Randomize