bad to tell him im pregnant over fbook chat?
i just stepped in cum. i hate you.
Thats what happens when you don't swallow.
We just found a handle of vodka in our fridge and no one knows how it got there. God I love spring break.
I got drunk and smashed his tv with the keg and so he blames me for being evicted.
Also, I'd like to add that that I'm not quitting my job, my boss fed me shots at 11 am this morning.
we smoked out of your homemade aunt jamima bong
Just saw the guy with the plastic bag on his head riding his bike again...
Hypothetically going to the gym on coke was a good idea
please come upstairs a drunk asian is lying down n the middle of my room and i don't know him
Yea. I feel great. My life is great. My job isn't as shitty. And my daddy loves me. I love strip clubs. Great self esteem boost.
I have three different pairs of earrings at three different houses including your 16 year old brothers nightstand. Look at my life. Look at my choices
Some nice lady just gave me a beer out of her purse. I love youth hockey
So how do I get back in good graces for trying to trade you for superbowl tickets?
I've only hooked up with engineers this year and it may be the best future financial decision I've ever made
bonging vodka is the same level of "good idea" as eating machetes
Randomize
