whjeg hajt iyt
say what?
wanna hang out?
Bt dubs, I still have cuts on my arm from when you attacked me with a dildo on Saturday night.
I thought we agreed I wasn't a screamer?
I just put a tampon in while driving. Don't tell me I don't got skills.
I just had a flashback of 4:30am: me hugging the toilet bowl and you handing me a jar of pickles to open. There is something seriously wrong with us.
we aren't going to have kids. there's a 50% chance that they would look like him. not worth the risk
Her roomates have been scoring her hookups. I got 8.9, best of the week!
I CAME HOME WITH MY NIPPLES PEIRCED! WE WERE CAMPING. IN THE MOUNTIANS. I DONT EVEN REMEMBER IT AT ALL.
Someone left their drag queen on my couch. On the plus side, he sure does know how to make a mean cup of coffee.
What we have is to special to throw away over a woman who spreads her butt cheeks on a pool table for me...
All I know for sure is, I went to bed drunk and I woke up in a relationship..I think I need to reevaluate my drinking skills.
Do you ever get so high you're like vibrating
Hey how're your balls?
Don't ever let me helicopter again.
I have a whole new respect for her. She chugged half a bottle of jack daniels, and then peed all over his wall. Serves him right.
If by whore you mean UPGRADE....then yes I am
Randomize