Take a Tylenol with a HUGE glass of water before you pass out, you'll thank me in the morning.
i dony have tylonal but i had a snickers and popcorn and a bottle of water and i am.. brushing my teeth!
All I remember is yelling at him to admit he liked Bon Jovi, then accusing him of giving love a bad name.
My roomate just said the he would "tap dat" to the 13 out of control girl on maury. Im finding a new place in the morning.
my hot student got the clitoris wrong on the lab practical...so it kinda makes me not want to pursue it
just because he can't find it on a cat, doesn't mean he can't find it on you
Her boobs looked like leather oven mitts. No more cougar hunting for awhile.
just dropped my bong into 7 pieces, and carried the glass shards around my house. dad saw the blood dripping down my arms, and asked if i slit my wrists. way too high to laugh at this.
Like I couldn't describe it to you but if they did a lineup of penises i'd be able to pick it out.
i think i broke my dog last night...fuck
We would be rich. And the whole world would be stoned.
Haha yeah that's basically it. He was like "i've always had a thing for you, and even sober i still would do and feel the same way." so glad to know i am worthy of a sober hookup as well.
Just FYI, by the transitive property my breasts have now touched the Stanley Cup.
You came in last night, ate an entire avocado in silence, and then told me I should never accept rides from strangers. Not sure I even want to know what happened to you last night!
Was it your intent last night to burn the house down? With a waffle..
The Lion King Is on YouTube
Until 2 minutes ago I actually had a chance to pass my midterms... thanks alot
A cop may or may not have seen my bare ass against the moonlight within the past hour
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