where are you
in your bedroom
how did you get in
your wife…
WTF
I think I saw a glimmer of recognition, but she must not have been able to make me out through all of her whorishness.
would you consider him our boss?
technically yes
then technically i slept with our boss
She was wasted. Kept yelling "what if I'm pregnant" and trying to push me into the tree. First and last time I bring a girl to my family christmas party.
I feel as though I could trust her, I mean she did tell me she was married before we had sex.
And I know a few people wouldnt want to even be around high people. Which is sad. But jet packs are cool.
I just realized that two weekends in a row we ended up in a bathroom with two different boys asking us for a threesome. does this happen to everyone?
apparently i was cut off before i even walked in
This is why Helen Keller didn't drink
Then that means he's outwardly conservative. Inwardly he's a total gay horndog. He's like a spy that can ruin conservative plans.
I want to change all my life goals to that.
Update. A gay dude just told me I'm the most beautiful thing with a vagina he as ever seen. How should I feel about this?
I woke up this morning wearing his boxers as a shirt
So I pass out narcotics if its a girl?
Don't judge me. It's a Monday night and I can eat burritos in while bathing in the kitchen sink if I want to.
It's like I'm tryna ride my horse through dennis quaid’s vineyard
That's a sexy sentence
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