are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
I really want to sleep with her friend. I'm hoping our casual sex relationship will somehow lead to that.
Do you think they'll have a special part during the BET awards for Michael Jackson even though he turned white?
so... thinking about masturbating finally
taking the losers way out I see
i can't believe he got me to come over to him by waving a natty light at me.
people who like being in relationships make me feel bad about myself.
It was an awkward 3some. I took her from behind while he just made out with her.
You are the only one who would stop a bum, tell him to open up, then pour straight vodka in his mouth. You made his year.
Your boyfriend and I are bonding over your giant dick.
I am not betting on the failure of any friend that is not you.
To the person who put the glitter on my ceiling fan...fuck you
Like real life can suck my metaphorical dick right now.
I'm scrolling through our convo thread and all we talk about is pizza, alcohol & dick with the occasional "I miss you" thrown in.
So that guy from plenty of fish has a lightning bolt tattooed on his face. I kinda feel like I HAVE to sleep with him now.
That's brilliant but could get us arrested. Give me shots until I shout LET'S DO THIS
Randomize
