hey, can i borrow that thing you never use?
what?
your penis
his profile picture is a blurry one of him holding a beer. i recognized him instantly.
I think their strategy was based on people bein at a beach, seein a rainbow, and havin an orgasm at the same time.
He ended up walking out of his bedroom and told me to look at the nonexistent fire he was holding in his hand. Im upset I didn't take those shrooms.
That little tingle vodka gives me in my esphagus is what lets me know I'm still alive.
Blackout me just wants to pee on sober me's dreams. Literally.
I FOUND AN AUSTRALIAN THEY CALL VOMMING 'RAINBOW SNEEZING' I'M NEVER LETTING HIM LEAVE EVER
We were destined to go to rehab together
I won't trust your judgement until the word stripper doesn't make me laugh
Like real life can suck my metaphorical dick right now.
In an unrelated matter, im gonna eat you out so much later.
I JUST AGREED TO GO TO A CHILD'S BIRTHDAY PARTY AT A PLACE CALLED PUZZLE'S FUN DOME WHY DO I HATE MYSELF
Sometimes the most spiritual fucking thing to do is punch somebody in the face.
I was at his place until 2am. We just sat really close an stared at each other. I think you are right. Germans must not have feelings. Not even tingly ones in their pants.
That would involve putting on clothes and I don't think I can face that right now.
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