Skinny jeans should not be made in size 14. Then, it's just a lie.
Is it bad that I just used Smirnoff as mouthwash?
She put baby oil on her toes and i am not legally allowed to talk about what happened
I just used an app to identify a song that was playing in the background of a porno. May god bless your soul steve jobs.
I hope he doesn't find the chex mix when he takes my shirt off.
She's trying to master eating with her feet. She said it was be she "always has to be prepared."
Dude I think my special talent is falling in drunkenly falling in front of a cop and getting away. This is the second time.
after I lost so many games of beer pong they made me be a troll, I sat under the table and told riddles while retrieving balls.
I've actually, minus lsat night have actually changed my drinking habits
You did profess your love for cotton multiple times and your hatred for all other fabrics
Do u like your dick pics shot in hotdog or hamburger orientation?
I've never wanted to punch a 94 year old woman in the vagina, and then call her next of kin to tell them I just muff punched their Gam Gam until today.
So I paid Bumble $10 to see who liked my profile for a month. Cheap, easy dick. It's all about the economics, yo.
What are you feeling right now?
Idk. I just flashed a porch 🤷🏼♀️
So not in the best place to do an emotional inventory
So. Much. Porn.
Randomize
