it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
why do they call them blowjobs? ....unless i'm doing it wrong?
three words: i give head
three words: not that well
Her parents came home early, i had to hug her mom with a condom on...
Just got the test results back. All clean, Now whose an idiot for going bareback in South America for 3 months straight.
Then he wanted a handjob in the car. While my cousin was driving. To krispy kreme. And there was someone else in the backseat.
Jesus...So southern.
Look if 10 am was too early to go barrel tasting the winery would not be open.
You are a piece of meat with a side of awesome to me.
So I'll bring my machete and we can smoke your shit.
Out of context, that is a hilariously scary message.
Is it okay to thank someone for the orgasms they gave you, even though they weren't with you?
I WOULD SERIOUSLY RECOMMEND THE SHIT THAT I AM ON RIGHT NOW
That's why my New Years resolution was no more blondes. They're all bad news
I was not drunk enough for that final.
Do you remember feeding the vacuum doritos last night?
Wow you are like a taller more attractive sex Yoda.
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