He had personality for days, but cock for only minutes
pube in her braces AGAIN. barely kept a straight face.
I'm not to broken up about it. Our relationship was worse than a coldplay song.
so i was dancing to the glee soundtrack with highheels. i tripped. and the dildo fell on my face. i dont know what happened.
He left his shoes, boxers and socks at my house & managed to walk home to his dorm without realizing anything was missing until 3 days after. That's the last time i'll ever hook up with a freshman.
All I'm saying is that your next houseguest had better not barge in on me in the shower demanding I wash the stolen dye from his hair. I'm not doing that a second time.
I fail to see the problem of enjoying a glass of wine while I poop...
the point I'm tryimg to make is that you didn't need to take the whole box in with you
apparently my buddy was fucking on our couch downstairs so i decided it was necessary to walk downstairs naked in a hockey mask.
She had never heard the term "grundle" before. Classiest girl I've met in months
I saw seagulls fucking earlier today. What have you done with your life recently?
Was just trying to have a normal "I fucked you without a condom" adult conversation and she flipped
just creeped your profile pictures and you should feel satisfied in knowing that you had great eyebrows even before people started drawing them on
this isn't the first time drunken padiddle ended in a fist fight..
the guy in front of me in walmart is buying a blowtorch, potato chips, and condoms. I'm curious and horrified at the same time.
You passed out in my backseat like a legitimate infant. A really drunk, really horny infant
Randomize
