we went to that german restaurant and drank out of the boots. Then I threw up into one
everything was goin great until he pulled out his ed hardy lighter and smoked in my face like he was cool.
it's like you attract all the douchebags that nobody wants. people should thank you.
his penis was like watching paranormal activity your very hyped up to see it but you think it might be very scary and in the end you didnt really see anything at all
The worst mistakes make the best memories. Write that down.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm sorry for what I said earlier...your vagina wouldn't look funny If you had a kid.
Received a verbal warning at work for "riding in a trash receptacle, violating professionalism & infection control."
What kind of gift says: "I love you because you're my mom & I'm obligated to, but I don't like you" ?
But he's not just anonymous male genitalia anymore. I've met him, I've seen his face.
This is literally engraved into my seat "Need crack?" And then there's a number. This isn't real.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Like, you've got the smoothest dick in the west. Do you moisturize?
Yes I do
Can you come get me? I woke up in the woods behind the Super 8. I have pizza.
I don’t know what he is but he sure can suck a lollipop.
I wasn't talking about him I meant his penis! Its not a pet
Oh. Well it should be. I like petting it.
HEY I WILL KIDNAP THE FUCK OUT OF YOUR PET GOAT
I remember you banged her while I was dying on your couch, so good call
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