dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
Trying not to fart in the comp lab is going to take everything i've got.
i wish that every time i slipped on a sheet of ice i had the ability to recover with a michael jackson move
Renamed my iPod as 'the titantic' so when I plug it in it's says 'the titantic is syncing.'
It's very clear that i'm the girl sweating out four lokos at 2 in the afternoon at the gym
He grabbed onto my boobs while slipping on ice then proceeded to drag me down with him I'm not predicting head in his future
Just saw ur booking photo. Love that u were already wearing orange. Its like u knew
I don't know what to tell you, usually I would just ask if they'd like to meet the captain. If you can't get laid it's your problem.
You're welcome to join, but just to warn you, tequila makes my clothes disappear. And I'm telling you that as an adult to an adult, not as your supervising teacher who decides whether or not you graduate.
yeah...that's gonna come up in court
He ate the contents of an ashtray and didn't puke, I think he can handle drinking a fifth to himself.
He told me"I think your ready for this" and went into his closet whipped out a movie certiffied light saber.
Stuck in the Minneapolis airport for 3 hours with an expense budget and a wine bar. This could get out of hand quickly.
The cat was building a spaceship out of the carpet, my legs were cans of tomato sauce, and there was something else in that pot you gave me.
Oh and it’s been a year according to my snap chat memories since I banged your cousin in your sons truck pulled over on Elm St! 😂😂😂😬😳😇
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