I will be horny for about another two hours. Feel free to call me until then.
Why do girls get to wear clothes that say "do me now" but guys don't have that kind of option?
I mean, what would the male equivalent of a slutty dress be?
I play with my boobs when I'm bored. I playwith my nipples whe I'm drunk
I have an excuse to be a whore in Mexico. I'm conducting an experiment to see if small dicks are caused by the poor drinking water.
Also since my birthday I've on average fucked a new guy every 12.5 days. I'm doing an excel spreadsheet
It's like an R Kelly music video in here. Only a matter of time before someone pisses on someone
Everyone else in class agrees the weed smell is coming from me
You disappeared for 10 minutes. Then came back with nothing but your boxers and a life jacket on to tell us we were all screwed when the flood came and you would be the only survivor.
It takes a special friend to go vibrator shopping with
Yes. It does.
Ladies and gentlemen, the only person I know who would keg stand in pearls and a bow.
Dude your life.. At your sugar daddies house sending nudes to your fwb
Cleaned the whole house at 7:30 and after cleaning the bathroom I think I had cocaine on my sweatpants
You have to get it done early. Like a dick drive by. Hit it and run.
So Saturday night after 10 drinks I guess he tried to have sex with me and in the middle of it I asked "can you tell I'm faking it!?" and then I sat up and threw up in my hand. That's a sex Win in my books
My mom just looked at me and said; "You've been pretty bitchy lately do you need some dick?" WTF has happened to me?
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