Damn I can't remmbre the last tome I had sobr sex
Um. I believe with my boyfriend, slut
Fuck. Wron person. But yea
I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
Dude dan is so baked he taped his remote to the futon so he couldn't lose it again. Come over here
I kept telling myself all night that it was completely okay for me to lose all sense of my morals because it was my birthday.
two questions - what stuff of mine was pawned and who has the pawn tickets.
I think you're going to have to drive me to white haven. I don't know if my brain can handle having my mom drop me off at a strip club.
I like to take my ritalin one pill at a time with each pill spaced out a couple minutes so I feel like I'm going super saiyan when they kick in.
Everyone at work loved my story about sobering up in a river with no bra on.
The sense of comroderie I've built with my liver over the course of this semester is beautiful
I'm drawing the line at your vagina. I will not accompany you to get that pierced and/or tattooed. There's got to be some mystery to our relationship.
Packing a mid day bowl in the Sonic parking lot. Have I gone too stoner?
Literally just inhaled three cinnamon rolls. Sara is staring. It was inhuman
I'm rolling and just noticed that the thread count on these sheets is horrendous.
So apparently last night while I was drunk I read him erotic fanfiction while he was eating me out. He stopped every now and then to give me feedback.
I think I just received the most dignified proposition of my life. From the father of the bride. Who'd have thought.
Randomize
