I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
dude we were spooning naked in bed with her ass in my crotch. she sharted in her sleep all over my dick.
I didn't realize how hung over I was until I rolled over and the world rolled over with me.
don't tell her this, but while we were doing it doggy style I picked up my phone and changed my status to "who let the dogs out"
Kinda felt bad though cuz she whimpered and shuttered a lot, i felt like i was kicking a puppy, only the puppy liked it and came a bunch
i should have probably stopped drinking when my beer pong shots were hitting the other team in the face..
yeah thats usually a good indication.
He gave me a promise ring. He promised that he will imagine me as every girl he fucks in college.
New game: find the sober person in Tbell
why is there a clump of hair nailed to my wall?
She nearly killed the mood when she said "Don't cum on my spray tan"
Hung over. Bed full of legos for some reason. Not getting up. Come build stuff with me.
They just called to see if he wanted to come in at 2am for overtime. He's trashed. He literally carried on a 10 minute convo with his boss about woodchucks. As in the animal
Not sure I just ate a really big pot brownie, I feel like my future is uncertain
It's a fucking menopause festival down here at the strike zone
Two things. 1) party at my house this Friday 2) what was the name of the Australian you fucked on the cruise ship?
Randomize
