At a bar where three women in denim shorts are debating techniques and skillsets for wrangling goats. You stay classy Delaware.
question. what would be the least awkward way to ask your one night stand if he came inside of you because you would really prefer not to have his illegitimate lovechild. hypothetically.
I wasn't sure if "you're even prettier in the dark" was a compliment. Hmm.
i think you ate grass..but you refused to open your mouth so we could see..
Bitches at mcdonalds acting like they never seen a girl puke in her own coat pocket before
These shoes are way too nice for a walk of shame. Its how I keep myself in line.
No, that's just what we do when we hang out. We get drunk, have really awesome sex, then fight about why we never worked as a couple
There is blood on the door to my room, I have to go to sleep
Let me tell you the story of bicurious george
Last night I dressed up as a cowgirl and walked into McDonald's. I bought 20 mcribs. There's pictures
I feel like a girl who eats her problems away with fast food.
When all else fails, you can always look down at your enormous penis.
I finally figured out how to tighten my bra straps and I feel like a god
Tight. Want to get up, make coffee, sit on separate couches and silently read our mobile devices together?
He makes me want to cheat on my other 3 boyfriends..
just spent the last 20 minutes cleaning out the soap dispenser. fuck. me. adderall.
Randomize
