weddingsv make me drug and hornr
He's totally hot and awesome. And he's a Democrat
Good, so he won't mind when you kill the baby.
im at that stage where all she has to do is cough or something and it pisses me off
He told me he was 'pondering the natural wonder that is my ass'
Like, dude. I'm already fucking you, you don't need to wax poetic.
Isn't he wasted enough that he might actually mean it and not just be trying to get you to fuck him without a condom?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What did I eat last night that was bloody?
Her vagina felt like a fur coat. It was weird at first but I kinda liked it
The bouncer called to give me my shoes back when I got there he said " I'm all cool with fuvking bitches but when you try to to do it in my bar on the pool table you're gonna get chocked out every time"
At least you got your shooes
You me handle of captain and a sorostitute study sesh, if we don't get laid mancards must be relinquished
I just haymakered a dude with my face, can we talk about ME for a second and not the guy I fought?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Afternoon delight is playing while I take a shit at mcdonalds
He surprised me with a puppy tail butt plug in his ass and wants me to fuck him
My vagina just clenched in fear
Dude.. She just busted into my house wearing a ski mask, a poncho, and thigh-high pink hooker boots and yelled, "THE CABS ARE HEEERRREEE!!"
Are you drinking tequila at 1pm? ...at Disneyland?
thank you for the vibrator recommendation, i've come six times today and it's only noon
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