i guess its officially winter break. i woke up alone and fully clothed this morning.
his facial hair looked like he just ate out someone's ass
I wonder what gingers are like in bed...as awkward as their hair or just as unique as it...?
She agreed that we could have sex whenever I wanted and I could let someone else meet my mom.
You fed me milk from the beer bong because you thought it would "Sober you up" .
Part of my whole not being a slut anymore involves not giving other peoples boyfriends blowjobs
I'm using her two yr old as a arm rest while I attempt to feel her up. Somehow she is allowing it. How this transitions to sex should be interesting.
Also, I might need your help for a prank involving a hand puppet, a coke bottle, double-sided tape, and my dick...
You know it's last call at a gay bar when the guys at the urinal are just jacking off in front of each other. Most awkward pissing moment of my life.
I sleep texted my mom and asked her for a condom last night
Paying for my weed with Mike's hard lemonade freezables. The perks of having a gay dealer
I love how four vibrators are within reach of me right now, but not a single hair brush or comb
Did I tell you he put a lobster carcass on his dick?
If you dont get laid dressed as Woody Harrelson in Zombieland, I have lost all faith in the men of nw Indiana.
There's a guy in a plaid shirt running around asking everyone if they want to head butt him
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