from now on my penis is your penis
I can't believe you're trying to guilt me into a blow j because a tornado made you homeless.
Is it working?
Alosmot hir two of of mt mailanoxwa
Oh Jesus.
That's the last time I do shots near a campfire.
I feel like everytime I call him he's either fucking or getting into trouble. It's really disturbing that he presses the answer button and then proceeds to fuck her harder.
Btw after this weekend the chipndales costume has a 125% success rate.
My vagina is not really on board with my "emotional issues"
I feel like we shud celebrate your sisters homecoming by having sex in her room
He came over drunk in a speedo i told him he has my vote he said who are you voting for when i said obama he took off running and shouting i was worthless like an empty beer can
Correction... Drunk on winter break. There are no days of the week on break.
The fact that it was "anything but a cup" now explains the cowboy boots and fishbowl aftermath at the apartment.
My ex-fiancee UPS-ed me a sixer of tall boys, and a fifth of bourbon for christmas, from halfway across the country. What does this mean?
Is her birthday actually on cinco de mayo? That makes so much sense
please tell dad to clear the porn off his tablet before he lends it to anyone from now on
Would you by any chance know if there is a proper protocol for traveling with one's vibrator? I wouldn't want the TSA to rip open my suitcase in front of my boss.
Randomize
